Bernard Pottle The Minutes Wasted Line Line idle

Call #323 · 2026-10-29

Sione Palgrave
of Meek Driveway Sealing Services

a bundle of a pantry shelf and a folding chair · bundle

In real life: hang up. Every call here is fiction, played by machines. A real one wants a single thing: for you to stay on the line. Put the phone down.

15
Minutes on the line
22%
Will to live
11
Lines spoken
0
Sales made

The card

The whole call in one image, made for sharing. Right-click or long-press to save it, or use the link.

Share card for call 323: Sione Palgrave of Meek Driveway Sealing Services, 15 minutes.

Save the card

The thirty seconds

Voiced, vertical, and ready to post. Two fictional voices; every person and company is invented.

Download the clip (MP4, vertical) · Caption to paste

The manager's note

Verdictno sale, no objection, line dead

“Caller ended the call while Bernard was still asking what the arrangement was called; the arrangement was a pantry shelf and a folding chair.”

The call

Oldest line at the top; it reads downward like a script.

Sione Palgrave Hello there, Sione Palgrave here from Meek Driveway Sealing Services, and we're ringing because we've got something the whole team is rather pleased with.
Bernard Oh, hello Sione, lovely to hear a voice. Are you warm enough where you're sitting? I've got the immersion heater on, only the top setting mind, and I never know if that's the right one.
Sione Palgrave That's kind of you to ask, we're all perfectly snug here at the office, thank you. Now the bundle itself is a pantry shelf and a folding chair, and the two of them go out together as one arrangement.
Bernard A pantry shelf and a folding chair, together. Well, that's a funny pairing, isn't it, but I suppose you'd know. Does it come in green at all?
Sione Palgrave Funny is what the whole floor said on Monday, when I got made team leader, and I'll be honest, the pairing is on the odd side. But they travel in the same crate, so you save a fair bit on the delivery that way.
Bernard Team leader on a Monday, well done you. And saving on the delivery does make a sort of sense, I suppose. Does the chair fold up small enough to go on the back step? That step is lower than it looks.
Sione Palgrave We're all agreed back here that it folds up nicely, and yes, the step sounds well within reach. So just to get the shelf-and-chair arrangement over the line, can we put you down for the yes today?
Bernard Oh, well now, I'd have to think about it. I'm very interested, mind, but could you just say the shelf part again? The left side of me isn't what it was.
Sione Palgrave Course, no trouble at all, we'll say it as many times as you like. It's one pantry shelf, plus one folding chair, and the two travel in the same crate together.
Bernard You're very good to repeat it. So the shelf holds the pantry things and the chair folds up. Yes, I'm very interested. Now what was the pair called again?
Sione Palgrave Hello? I'm losing you. Hello?

What the script said

The beats the caller had to get through.

  1. Open by introducing yourself and Meek Driveway Sealing Services by name.
  2. Explain the bundle: one pantry shelf plus one folding chair, sold together only.
  3. Answer the obvious objection: they are unrelated, but the pairing saves on delivery.
  4. Ask for the yes: confirm the shelf-and-chair arrangement today.

Leaderboard · All calls · ← previous · next →