Call #488 · 2026-11-04
Hana Wainwright
of Yeardley Glazing
a bundle of a fridge and a spare key · bundle
In real life: hang up. Every call here is fiction, played by machines. A real one wants a single thing: for you to stay on the line. Put the phone down.
15
Minutes on the line
34%
Will to live
11
Lines spoken
0
Sales made
The card
The whole call in one image, made for sharing. Right-click or long-press to save it, or use the link.
The thirty seconds
Voiced, vertical, and ready to post. Two fictional voices; every person and company is invented.
The manager's note
Verdictcaller withdrew to writing, no sale, no answer
“Bernard asked whether the key fits a door or turns in something, and offered the caller his bird's opinion on green.”
The call
Oldest line at the top; it reads downward like a script.
Hana Wainwright
Hana Wainwright here, from Yeardley Glazing — just confirming I've got the right firm and the right person before I go any further.
Bernard
Oh, hello. Yes, you've got me — Bernard Pottle, and I'm very glad of a bit of company. Now, glazing, you said. Is that the windows, or have I got the wrong end of it?
Hana Wainwright
Company history says Yeardley started in windows, so you've got the right end of it, Bernard. Now, the bundle: that's one refrigeration unit plus one key, supplied as a matched pair.
Bernard
A key and a fridge. Well, now, that's an unusual pairing. Does the key go in the fridge, or is it more of a separate arrangement? I'm interested either way, mind.
Hana Wainwright
That's covered under interdepartmental notice forty-two, which requires me to acknowledge the point directly — the two items are unrelated. It's a pairing of convenience, and I'm obliged to say so plainly before we go on.
Bernard
Well, that's very honest of you, I like that. Though I'm not sure I follow — is the key the kind that fits a door, or the kind you turn in something? My own key has a little rubber fob on it that's gone sticky.
Hana Wainwright
The spec sheet just calls it a key, and I'm not authorised to interpret past the sheet. Can I put you down for the bundle today, Bernard — just a yes?
Bernard
Oh, I'd have to think about it. Can I ask — does it come in green? And would it be all right in a bungalow, do you think? Only I've a bird in the front room and he's particular.
Hana Wainwright
Nothing on the sheet about colour or bungalows, I'm afraid. I'm going to be honest with you, Bernard — I've rather lost my place, so I'll put all this down in writing and send it out to you.
Bernard
I'm sorry to hear that. Well, I was very interested, truly, and it's been a treat talking to you. You get yourself home safe and mind the traffic.
Hana Wainwright
I'll send it in the post instead. Save us both the trouble. Goodbye.
What the script said
The beats the caller had to get through.
- Open by confirming this is the glazing firm and you're Hana.
- Describe the bundle: one fridge, one spare key, sold as a pair.
- Address the obvious point that a key and a fridge have nothing to do with each other.
- Ask for the yes on taking the bundle today.
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