Bernard Pottle The Minutes Wasted Line Line idle

Call #279 · 2026-10-28

Colin Prasad
of The Trust for the Care of Empty Lofts

a replacement for a window catch that is not broken · needless replacement

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15
Minutes on the line
34%
Will to live
11
Lines spoken
0
Sales made

The card

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Share card for call 279: Colin Prasad of The Trust for the Care of Empty Lofts, 15 minutes.

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The thirty seconds

Voiced, vertical, and ready to post. Two fictional voices; every person and company is invented.

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The manager's note

Verdictno sale, no objection, bucket pending

“Bernard asked whether the catch needed feeding; Colin confirmed it does not, and closed the call himself.”

The call

Oldest line at the top; it reads downward like a script.

Colin Prasad Good afternoon, this is Colin Prasad from The Trust for the Care of Empty Lofts. We're ringing because a window catch that isn't broken is, frankly, our favourite kind of window catch.
Bernard Well, now, that's very good of you to say so. And what was the name again — the Crust? Only I've got a bucket in the hall, under the shed roof, and it's been filling since Friday. Is it the Crust that looks after that sort of thing?
Colin Prasad It's the Care of Empty Lofts, sir, and no, we don't do buckets. But your catch — it goes wrong so quietly that nobody ever finds out.
Bernard Oh, quietly, right you are. Like the notices in my porch, all pinned up and nobody reads them. So the catch doesn't make a fuss, then. Does it need feeding at all, or does it just sit there being quiet?
Colin Prasad That's exactly it, sir, it just sits there being quiet, and that's the whole trouble. Now, nothing's wrong with it at all — which is precisely why we'd like to replace it.
Bernard Nothing wrong with it, well, that's a relief. But then why are we replacing it — is the new one going to be wrong in some way I'd notice? I'd have to think about that. Oh, and would it come in green?
Colin Prasad We'd have to check the green, sir. And I'll be quick — the whole floor's behind me on this, I was made team leader on Monday, so just to confirm, can we put you down for the catch?
Bernard Team leader, well done you. Now, is it the Crust that's behind you on this, or someone else? I only ask so I say yes to the right person.
Colin Prasad The Care of Empty Lofts, sir, that's the one. So if we can just say yes to the catch replacement, we can get this closed off nicely.
Bernard Yes, yes, I'm very interested, I am. But I'd have to think about it, and I've got a chap coming about the bucket, so — it's been lovely, mind the traffic on the way home.
Colin Prasad Right. I'll let you get back to your afternoon. Goodbye.

What the script said

The beats the caller had to get through.

  1. Introduce yourself and the Trust as concerned custodians of empty lofts.
  2. Explain the current window catch fails silently in undiscovered ways.
  3. Assure them nothing is wrong, which is exactly why replacement matters.
  4. Ask for their yes to schedule the not-needed window catch replacement.

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